Getting Started in the Collaborative Divorce Process

Collaborative Divorce takes threats, hide-the ball tactics and court room battles off the table. It gives divorcing couples the choice to participate in a private, confidential process geared towards collective problem-solving. In a collaborative divorce, a team of professionals guides the couple through the emotional, legal and financial challenges facing them at the end of their marriage.

The process begins with each spouse consulting with and retaining his or her independent collaboratively trained attorney. The attorneys then confer about whether or not it is necessary to assemble an interdisciplinary team of professionals, including a divorce coach, child specialist, and/or financial neutral.

At the first meeting between collaborative attorneys and clients, everyone signs a Participation Agreement where they commit to negotiate respectfully, honestly, to voluntarily exchange documents and all material information and work together to find solutions to the legitimate needs of both parties, and, most importantly, their children.

The Collaborative Law process terminates if court action becomes and both attorneys are disqualified from any further involvement in the case.

There is a lot more to the process, so if the first steps above sound like the kind of divorce you wish to have, contact a collaboratively trained attorney to schedule a consultation.

Irene King is the Founder of King Collaborative Family Law in Charlotte, NC, where she practices exclusively collaborative family law and serves as a certified mediator of family conflict. She is committed to guiding clients in resolving their conflicts and rebuilding for the future with integrity and dignity.

The Collaborative Divorce Process is worth considering if some or all of these are true for you:

1. You want a respectful resolution of the issues that have led to the end of your marriage.

2. You have children and you desire to have the best co-parenting relationship possible.

3. You value self-determination and do not want to hand over responsibility of critical decisions related to your financial affairs and future parenting of your children over to a stranger (i.e., a judge in a courtroom setting).

4. You want to protect your children from the scorch-the-earth tactics associated with litigation.

5. You believe personal responsibility is important for handling conflicts.

6. You do not want the details of your divorce in the public record.

7. You recognize that the range of options generally available in court are limited and you want an individualized approach to finding creative, cost-efficient solutions for your particular situation.

8. You value taking an active role in restructuring your family rather than rehashing hurts from the past.

9. You understand that the other person has needs and priorities that need to be met and you desire to find a way to minimize the uncertainty associated with meeting your and the other person’s needs and priorities.

10. You value the importance of maintaining a positive relationship with the other person in the future over maximizing the amount of money and property you get for yourself during the divorce.

Irene King is the Founder of King Collaborative Family Law in Charlotte, NC, where she practices exclusively collaborative family law and serves as a certified mediator of family conflict. She is committed to guiding clients in resolving their conflicts and rebuilding for the future with integrity and dignity.